Cerebral? Really?

After moving in with my girlfriend, getting a dog and going to weddings almost every weekend for about two months, my summer is finally slowing down a little. And to celebrate, I went to an open mic last Monday.

I hadn't really prepared much for it. It was the first time that I wasn't using any new jokes and I just cobbled together 5 minutes from stuff I'd already written and performed, hoping to put together a real strong set. Whether I accomplished that or not is up for debate.

Here's the thing... considering the prep I put into it, I was remarkably comfortable on stage. I thought I was smooth, composed and had a good rhythm going. I didn't fuck anything up and never stuttered. I even ad libbed a little, which I had never done before. It felt pretty good. But for whatever reason, the crowd wasn't digging me at all. I have a joke about birds becoming religious terrorists because they've learned how to take down planes. Hell, since it seems like any video of me is on a permanent hiatus, here it goes...

"I don't like birds, but I do like foreigners... which is a little confusing, since they're both friendly, everywhere and have learned how to take down planes... In one fell swoop, birds have become religious terrorists. You see, they've always been the animal closest to God... and now they want the sky back. Apparently, a 747 is no match for a flock of suicidal seagulls. I know, I know... I shouldn't joke about that. I mean, birds are dumb, but even they don't believe in God."

I like that joke, I think it's pretty strong and has gotten a good reaction each time so far. This time, it was only a couple laughs from the back. I was frustrated and quipped "You guys read the news, right? You know that birds took down a plane? -silence- Of course you do, you're an educated crowd." At another point there was a lonely Nelson Muntz-esque "Ha-HA" after a joke and immediately mocked the laugh and said "I don't need your pity laughs." So yeah, didn't go as well as I hoped. I didn't come close to bombing, but my favourite jokes didn't go over.

After I walked back a couple other comics said they liked it. One even said "I think your stuff was a little too cerebral for this crowd." I didn't think so, until a guy who went up after me and started with this joke.

"So I take the bus a lot, right? And you know what happens on the bus, people ask for your seat. So this old lady comes up to me and asks if she can have my seat. Of course, I do what anyone would do, I said 'Shut up you old bitch and sit on the floor!!!" [uproarious laughter] Anyways, I guess I just have to continue to find my audience, because a crowd that laughs at that certainly is not it.

As for the shameful lack of activity on this blog, I've been having a hard time thinking of things to write about. At first it was easy since I was taking classes every week and had plenty of stuff to cover. But now, unless I'm going up on stage all the time (which I suppose I should be doing) I find myself with little to impart your way. One idea I've had is to start reviewing comedy albums, like a music critic. Like, one a month or week something. I dunno... just something to keep this thing going and make sure I am writing. I could easily write about 10 reviews of albums I already listen to, so it seems logical and hopefully even entertaining.

Until then, go back and read some old posts. Maybe you missed a joke or two. They're like leftover chili. Always better the second time around.

Slacking a little bit...

So it's been a long time since I've posted anything here, or anywhere, for that matter. Here's the scoop of what I've been up to lately and for the next little while...

I moved on July 1st and was really busy with that. I'm pretty much settled in now, although I've still got a few boxes to unpack and shelves to put up, it's at the point where I'm comfortable enough that I've lost motivation to keep unpacking. Why do work when you can sit and watch tv? Then, I've got two weddings to go to in the next couple weekends, including a few parties and seeing lots of friends visiting from out of town. And I'm still playing softball a couple times a week, primarily on the open mic nights.

Unfortunately, because of all this, I haven't had much time to do anything comedic lately. I suppose I should be making the time, but I've been sidetracked by that other stuff. I keep seeing my classmates going to shows (in some cases multiple times a week) and I can't help but feel like I'm really slacking off right now. I'm not even getting out there to support them because I've got something going pretty much every night.

I've gotta start putting other stuff on hold and making stand-up more of a priority. Which is easier said than done, but I might as well let everyone know that I know that I'm a slacker. Which should also come as no surprise to anyone who knows me.

TGIF

I'm just happy it's Friday... I've had a long week. Only 3 more hours to go at work... but I'll use some of this lunch hour to update.

The past two weeks have been largely uneventful. I haven't done any more shows since softball keeps getting in the way, but this Monday I'm gonna try to book myself for the open mic at ComedyWorks. I was able to make it this past week to support a couple classmates and the overall talent was better than I thought it'd be, and several pros came out to try new material.

There were about 8 amateurs doing 5 mintue sets and 4 or 5 pros so the night dragged on just a little. It was the first open mic I'd been to there, so I found out how they pick who returns for the Best Of at the end of the month. There's a ballot, and you rate each comic on a 1-to-5 scale, 5 being the best. It seems pretty easy to stack it in your favour if you bring a tonne of friends to the show. I'm tempted to not tell people when I'm performing there, as a real test.

The top two were announced as getting a spot for the show. One of which was my favourite of the night, some skinny kid who was all one-liners. The only criticism I had of him was this line "My friends think I have a gambling problem. I bet them $10 that I don't." Really? You're gonna use that? That joke doesn't even do the word "filler" justice. That's like saying "I threw a box of Corn Flakes out the window. I'm a cereal killer." However, the bulk of his stuff was very good. My two comrades had decent if unspectacular sets.

In this "downtime" I've been writing a fair bit. At least half of the stuff I'll be using on Monday will be new. Also, I know everyone is still waiting for the video. Trust me, I am too. And the guy who taped it is getting harassed by everyone else. It's coming and I'll post it the second I can.